joseph_stevens
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| Credit Group, Portrayed By | uncredited unknown (photograph only) |
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| Died | Before 1961 |
| First Appearance | A House Full of Extremely Lame Horses |
| Last Appearance | A House Full of Extremely Lame Horses |
Joseph Stevens
Father of Danny Stevens.
Table of Contents
Biography
S5E7 - Danny Stevens takes Midge’s advice and talks about his life on The Gordon Ford Show to sell his book. He tells several stories about his parents, Mitta and Joseph.
Quotes & Dialogue
GORDON: Wow. Are these your parents?
DANNY: Yes, that is Mitta and Joseph. And that's after their number came in. But, see, my parents were immigrants. Tough. Very tough people. They had to be, because life gave them nothing. They didn't have a bed, they had a rock. They had to flee their village when men in boots on horses rode in saying, “Hey, what's flammable here?”
GORDON: That's terrible.
DANNY: They strapped everything they owned onto their backs and took off through forests and rivers, over mountains, all on foot. Snowstorms, bear attacks. I can't imagine it. If there's a line at Barney Greengrass, I have a nervous breakdown.
GORDON: Well, if they run out of that good sturgeon…
DANNY: Exactly. Finally, my parents get to Ellis Island where they were immediately quarantined for two months.
GORDON: Why?
DANNY: They were sick. They had everything. Typhoid, pneumonia, malaria. They were so sick, the immigration agent changed their name to… (coughs dramatically) I can't go by that name in show business. Too Jewish. Finally get out, move to a tenement on Delancey, and proceed to have nine children.
GORDON: Ooh.
DANNY: Because, as my mother said, (with accent) “Even if you can't afford the movies, Saturday night is still going to happen. You gotta do something!”
GORDON: Interesting philosophy.
DANNY: She was an interesting woman. Not a lot of hugs, but a survivor. She worked every day of her life. When I was in sixth grade, she got a job driving a laundry truck. One day, she was coming home, my father was crossing the street, he tripped, fell, and she ran right over him.
GORDON: Oh, my God. Was he okay?
DANNY: Oh, sure. I mean, he was dead, but other than that…
GORDON: That is the worst story I've ever heard.
DANNY: Two of her kids died, two others in jail. What family she had left was wiped out by the Nazis. Yet, through all of that, all the trials and tribulations, the only time I ever saw my mother cry was the day I told her I was going to be a comedian.
– S5E7
Appearances
Season 5
- A House Full of Extremely Lame Horses (uncredited) (photograph only)
See Also
joseph_stevens.txt · Last modified: 2026/08/13 22:05 by 127.0.0.1

